This far I’ve come, I’ve tried according dad’s mother all the respect I could master, but apparently it’s been all for naught; she refused to look at my sisters and I as her son’s daughters. Instead, she covered us with the same tainted cloth she did my mother. She extended the hatred she feels for my mother to us, refusing to see beyond the poverty mom came from.
Her favourite in-laws are the wealthiest ones, and as my mom is not, she remains her least favourite; her worst rather, yet she’s always thumping her chest saying, “I’m saved.” If I wasn’t a Christian already and I met her, I would hate everything Christianity stood for; thankfully, I know better. At this point it may seem like I’m haranguing out of anger but in the next post I will give an account of that blasted meeting we had, and I will let you be the judge of it.
The underlying point I’m trying to put across is that many of us claim to be saved, yet we perpetuate everything Jesus would stand against. For instance, I would like for dad’s mother to tell me what the Bible preaches about marriage. I would quote very many verses, e.g. man leaving his parents and starting a life with his wife, where the two shall live as one (Ephesians 5: 31) … what God has joined together let no man put asunder (Mark 10:9)…
The above verses refer to married couples. Astonishingly, thirty years after my parents met, dad’s mother is still trying to break them apart as she feels mom is still not the right woman for her son. Looking at it from her perspective, I would say yes, mom is poor, because she’s not as loaded as the rest of the daughter-in-laws; but what authority does she have, to try and split them up?
Dad’s siblings have failed miserably, relationship-wise and in my opinion it can all be attributed to their mother’s injudicious counsel; but I stand corrected. My deductions are primarily based on the fact that up until now she hasn’t acknowledged the wonderful woman dad married. Since she’s known mom she’s been too busy fault-finding, that I feel it will be too late when she realizes she lost out on a gem like the humble woman my mother is when she was too occupied collecting ordinary stones.
If it wasn’t for the respect I accord my elders, I would give her a detailed account of the agony dad has put mom through, then I would want her to tell me who of the two doesn’t deserve the other. In her case, apparently, age didn’t impart wisdom, because she still judges relationships and family ties based on the individuals’ pecuniary value. I pray to God I never get tired of saying this, but money is not everything; there are things that are far more precious.
Ironically, that same Sunday was still the anniversary of my maternal grams death. It’s been two years since she passed on and her memory is still fresh in our minds. I imagine if she were still alive, she would give dad’s mom a few words of wisdom.
For starters, dad’s mom hates mom because she’s not rich; not because she’s ever offended her in any way. On the other hand, when my maternal grams was alive, dad disrespected her in ways so unimaginable, yet she found it in her kind heart to forgive him. So how can dad’s mother claim to be a Christian, yet she manifestly perpetuates hatred and segregation?